Page Toppers

Quotes

• All gardeners live in beautiful places because they make them so. (Joseph Joubert)
• Among gardeners, enthusiasm and experience rarely exist in equal measures. The beginner dreams of home-grown bouquets and baskets of ripe fruit, the veteran of many seasons has learned to expect slugs, mildew, and frost. (Roger Swain)
• A beautiful garden is your reward for doing God's yard work.
• The best way to make sure something is a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.
• But make no mistake: the weeds will win; nature bats last. (Robert M. Pyle)
• Cares melt when you kneel in your garden.
• Despite the gardener's best intentions, Nature will improvise. (Michael P. Garafalo)
• A garden is a friend you can visit any time.
• The garden is a mirror of the heart
• A gardener is a plant manager.
• A gardener tills it like it is.
• Gardeners are down to earth.
• Gardeners know the ground rules.
• Gardeners often work over-thyme.
• Gardeners work is a lot of trowel and error.
• Gardening is a growing concern
• Gardening is about enjoying the smell of things growing in the soil, getting dirty without feeling guilty, and generally taking the time to soak up a little peace and serenity. (Lindley Karstens)
• Gardening requires lots of water - most of it in the form of perspiration. (Lou Erickson)
• Gardens are demanding pets. (Michael P. Garofalo)
• Gardening...just another day at the plant.
• Gardening, Law of: You get the most of what you need the least.
• Give your weeds an inch and they'll take your yard
• Gloves come in handy when you weed 'em and reap.
• Herbs make good scents
• Happiness Must be Grown in One's Own Garden
• How cunningly nature hides every wrinkle of her inconceivable antiquity under roses and violets and morning dew! (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
• I have a little garden, I scratch it with a hoe
  I happily plant the seeds and happily watch them grow.
• I tried to start a rock garden but they kept dying.
• I want Death to find me planting my cabbages. (Michel De Montaigne)
• If you are not killing plants, you are not really stretching yourself as a gardener. (J. C. Raulston)
• If you would have a mind at peace, a heart that cannot harden,
  go find a door that opens wide upon a lovely garden. (French Proverb)
• If your knees aren't green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life. (Bill Watterson)
• Inch by inch, row by row, Gonna make this garden grow!
• It is good to be alone in a garden at dawn or dark so that all its shy presences may haunt you and possess you in a reverie of suspended thought. (James Douglas)
• Leave room in your garden for fairies to dance.
• A little garden in which to walk and immensity in which to dream.
• My garden grows with love and hard work.
• My green thumb came only as a result of the mistakes I made while learning to see things from the plant's point of view. (H. Fred Ale)
• Old gardeners never die...they are just pruned back hard and repotted.
• Old gardeners never die...they just go to seed !
• Old gardeners never die...they just go to pot !
• Old gardeners never die. They just spade away and then throw in the trowel. (Herbert V. Prochnow)
• The only thing I grow in my garden is tired.
• A perennial is a plant that would have come back year after year if it had survived.
• Plant a little love, watch a miracle grow
• Plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. (Veronica A. Shoffstall)
• Rabbits have a habit of coming for breakfast and staying for lunch. Now there's one leaf instead of a bunch. (Gerry Krueger)
• She who plants a garden plants happiness!
• The shortest way to heaven is through a garden gate.
• Sod is instant grassification
• There can be no other occupation like gardening in which, if you were to creep up behind someone at their work, you would find them smiling. (Mirabel Osler)
• There is a kind of immortality in every garden. (Gladys Taber)
• There is never enough 'thyme'.
• Those who plant kindness, harvest love
• To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow.
• A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows. (Doug Larson)
• A weed is simply a plant that wants to grow where people want something else. In blaming nature, people mistake the culprit. Weeds are people's idea, not nature's.
• When gardening, I have one gift you won't find in any manuals.
  I know it's strange, but I can change perennials to annuals. (Dick Emmons)
• The world has different owners at sunrise...Even your own garden does not belong to you. Rabbits and blackbirds have the lawns; a tortoise-shell cat who never appears in daytime patrols the brick walls, and a golden-tailed pheasant glints his way through the iris spears. (Anne Morrow Lindbergh)
• You should compost...because a rind is a terrible thing to waste.

Here is a site that has quotes about gardening:
The Spirit of Gardening

Gardening ABC's

A abundance, abundant, aching back, acorn, African Daisy, Adirondack chair, air, almond, Aloe Vera, alone, Amaryllis, amazing, annual, ant, anticipation, aphid, apple tree, apricot, April, arbor, arch, artichoke, asparagus, Aster, atrium, August, autumn, avocado, awesome, Azalea
B backyard, bamboo, band aid, barbecue, barrel, basil, basket, beans, beautiful, beauty, bee, beetle, beets, Begonia, bench, berry, bird, bird house, Black-eyed Susan, Bluebonnet, bloom, blossom, bone meal, bonsai, boots, Boston Fern, bouquet, Boxwood, broccoli, bromeliad, bucket, bugs, bulbs, bunny, butterfly, Butterfly Bush, buzz
C cabbage, Camellia, Cannas, cactus, calendar, Calla Lilies, cantaloupe, Carnation, carrot, cart, caterpillar, catnip, cherry, chickadee, chamomile, chives, Chrysanthemum, cilantro, Clematis, climbing rose, clippers, cloud, clover, Coleus, Columbine, compost, Cone Flower, coniferous, corn, cornucopia, cricket, Crocus, cucumber, cultivator
D Daffodil, Dahlias, Daisy, dandelion, dawn, Daylilies, deck, deck chair, delicate, delicious, delightful, depth, dig, diligent, dill, dirt, dirty, Dogwood, dragonfly
E early, earth, earthworm, Easter Lilies, echinacea, Edelweiss, edging, effort, eggplant, elm, enjoyment, evergreen, exercise, exhausted, extra special, extraordinary
F fabulous, fairy, fall, fantastic, fantasy, faucet, fence, fennel, fern, fertilizer, finch, firefly, flower, flower pot, foliage, forget-me-not, forsythia, fountain, fragrance, front yard, frost, fruit, fungus
G garden, Gardenia, gardener, garland, garlic, gate, Geranium, gloves, Goldenrod, gopher, gorgeous, gourd, grape, grapefruit, grass, grasshopper, green, green thumb, greenhouse, grimy, ground cover, growing
H hammock, harmony, harvest, hat, Hawthorn, Heather, hearty, hedge, herbs, Hibiscus, hoe, holly, Hollyhock, Honeysuckle, horticulture, hose, hummingbird, hybrid, Hydrangeas, hydrant
I Ice Plant, iceberg lettuce, Ikebana, impressive, inch worm, incredible, Indian corn, Indian Paintbrush, industrious, insects, inspiring, Iris, ivy
J jack rabbit, Jacob's Ladder, Jade Plant, Jasmine, jeans, Jerusalem Cherry, Jicama, Jojoba, July, June, Juniper, just ___, "
K kale, killdeer, kiwi, knee pads, knotgrass, koi pond, kohlrabi, Kola Nuts
L ladybug, Lady's Slipper, land, landscape, Larkspur, Lavender, lawn, lawn mower, leaf, leaf rake, leaves, leeks, lemons, lettuce, lightning bug, Lilac, Lily, lizard
M magnificent, Magnolia, maple, March, Marigold, marjoram, May, Mayflower, meadow, meditation, mice, mistletoe, Morning Glory, mosquito, moth, Mother Nature, Mountain Laurel, mower, mowing the lawn, mud, mulch, mushrooms
N Narcissus, Nasturtium, natural, nature, nest, new, nice, Nightshade, nook, Norfolk Island Pine, nosegay, nursery, nut
O oak leaves, oak tree, olive, onion, orange, Orange Blossoms, Orchid, organic gardening, ornamental grass, outdoors, outside, outstanding, overalls
P pail, palm tree, pampas grass, Pansy, paradise, parasol, parsley, Passion Flower, path, patience, patio, peaceful, peach, pear, peas, Peony, pepper, perennials, pest, pine cone, pine tree, pitch fork, plants, plow, pollen, pond, poplar, Poppy, porch, potato, potted plants, praying mantis, pretty, pruner, puddle, pumpkin, Pussy Willow
Q quail, quaint, quaking aspen, quality, quantity, quarterly, barbeQue, Queen Anne's Lace, quiet, Quince, quite ___, quote,
R rabbit, raccoon, radish, rain, rainbow, raised beds, rake, raspberry, reap, red bud, relax, remarkable, reptile, Rhododendrons, rhubarb, robin, rock, rock garden, romaine, root, Rose, rosemary, row, rugged
S Saguaro Cactus, scent, seasons, seeds, September, shamrock, shovel, shower, shrub, side dressing, silence, slug, smell, snail, snake, sneeze, sorrel, sowing seeds, spade, spider, spring, sprinkler, squash, squirrel, statue, straw hat, strawberry, succession planting, summer, sun, sunburn, sundial, Sunflower, sunshine, sweet corn, Sweet Pea
T tan, tarragon, terrain, terrific, thunder, thyme, tiki torch, tiller, tomato, tools, transplant, tree, trellis, trimmer, trowel, Tulip
U ultimate, umbrella, umpteen, unbelievable, under construction, underneath, unforgettable, unique, unkempt, unripe, unusual, UV rays
V Valerian, variety, vegetable, veggies, Verbena, Viburnum, Vinca, vine, Violet, Virginia Creeper, visor, volunteer
W walk, walnut, warm, wasp, water, watercress, waterfall, watermelon, watering can, weather, weather vane, weed, weekend, well, wet, wheel-barrow, wildflower, wilderness, wind, window box, wishing well, woodpecker, work, worm, wow!
X X marks the spot, relaXation, eXcavator, eXcellent, eXceptional, Xeriscape, xerophytes (plants that like hot and dry), eXpert, eXtraordinary, eXtra special
Y yams, yard, yard work, yarrow, yearly ___, yew, yield, Yucca
Z Zabelia Triflora, Zantedeschia (Calla Lily), Zea Mays (sweet corn), zealous, zesty, Zinnia, zoysia grass, zucchini

Neither fences nor "No Hunting" signs deterred hunters from roaming on our wooded property. Finally my husband, an ardent organic gardener, found a natural solution. He silenced the guns with this sign: "Trespassers will be composted."

To Make a Prairie

(Emily Dickinson)

To make a prairie it takes clover and one bee;
One clover and a bee,
And reverie
The reverie alone will do
If bees are few.

Sundial Poem

The kiss of the sun for pardon,
The song of the birds for mirth.
One is nearer God's heart in a garden
Than anyplace else on earth.

Earth Voices

(Jessamyn West)

Earth's voice for gossip
is bees.
For all her sighing she
uses trees.
North wind is best to make
a groan,
Wind and old houses or wind
alone.
Earth whispers low with a
snowflake
For a quiet smile she likes
a lake
Roaring she leaves to
hurricanes.
Weeping is done with winter
rains.
Murmuring's a task for a
summer sea.
For singing she sometimes
uses me.

As Ye Sow, So Shall Ye Reap, Sometimes

(Pat Myren)

Lawns and God

GOD: St. Francis, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is going on down there in the USA? What happened to the dandelions, violets, thistle and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect, no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the long lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honeybees and flocks of songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But all I see are these green rectangles.
ST. FRANCIS: It's the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They started calling your flowers weeds and went to great lengths to kill them and replace them with grass.
GOD: Grass? But it's so boring. It's not colorful. It doesn't attract butterflies, birds and bees, only grubs and sod worms. It's temperamental with temperatures. Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing there?
ST. FRANCIS: Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and keep it green. They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn.
GOD: The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow really fast. That must make the Suburbanites happy.
ST. FRANCIS: Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it, sometimes twice a week.
GOD: They cut it? Do they then bale it like hay?
ST. FRANCIS: Not exactly Lord. Most of them rake it up and put it in bags.
GOD: They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?
ST. FRANCIS: No, sir - just the opposite. They pay to throw it away.
GOD: Now, let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so it will grow. And when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?
ST. FRANCIS: Yes, sir.
GOD: These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut back on the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves them a lot of work.
ST. FRANCIS: You aren't going to believe this, Lord. When the grass stops growing so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it so they can continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it.
GOD: What nonsense. At least they kept some of the trees. That was a sheer stoke of genius, if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn they fall to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes. Plus, as they rot, the leaves form compost to enhance the soil. It's a natural circle of life.
ST. FRANCIS: You'd better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle. As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay to have them hauled away.
GOD: No. What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter and to keep the soil moist and loose?
ST. FRANCIS: After throwing away the leaves, they go out and buy something which they call mulch. They haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves.
GOD: And where do they get this mulch?
ST. FRANCIS: They cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch.
GOD: Enough! I don't want to think about this anymore. St. Catherine, you're in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?
ST. CATHERINE: Dumb and Dumber, Lord. It's a real stupid movie about...
GOD: Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St. Francis.

I am not a lover of lawns. Rather would I see daisies in their thousands, ground ivy, hawkweed, and even the hated plantain with tall stems, and dandelions with splendid flowers and fairy down, than the too-well-tended lawn. (W.H. Hudson, The Book of a Naturalist, 1919)

For me ASCII art symbolizes the imagination of early computer users. I think it is wonderful that they could make pictures out of simple keyboard characters. However some people don't understand my fascination. To tease me one of my friends sent me this 'drawing' of his front lawn:

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Raccoon Problems

Of scare devices, the most elaborate security system I've heard of comes from Harrell Noble in southern Ohio. Raccoons were eating 95 percent of his sweet corn, and he didn't like that kind of arithmetic at all. He set a lighted lantern in the corn - probably the advice of a lantern salesman. The coons however did not know what a lantern was, and it took their counter-intelligence agents a week to determine the thing was harmless. By that time, sly Noble had picked the corn within the radius of the light's influence, which appeared to be about four rows wide and 15 feet long, then moved the lantern up into the next maturing plot. The coons caught on to this little trick in no time, so Noble ran an extension cord out to the garden and replaced the lantern with a bulb. In the socket he put one of those coin-sized blinker units so the bulb winked all night long.

The coons winked right back after the third night of this nonsense, and kept on munching corn.

By now Harrell Noble, who is an engineer used to solving problems of great magnitude, was beginning to do a slow burn. Having consulted all the auguries of scientific and unscientific tradition, the next year he strung a line of twine around the garden about 18 inches off the ground, and painted it with creosote. Geronimo. The Nobles actually ate some corn that season, as it was late August before the coons wised up.

Noble was also getting wiser, but by 1976 you might have thought he was suffering from a relapse and had slipped his wig completely. Or that the summer carnival had wandered too far out of town and got lost in his corn patch. Lights now winked inside yellow plastic buckets. Between blinkings, doorbells rang. Yeah, doorbells. The noise joined quaintly with the heavy aroma of creosote dripping from a thousand strings in the night air.

A triumph of modern technology. The coons were baffled. For two weeks. The only lasting effect, say the coon hunters, is that all you have to do to bring home a pickup load of coons is go out in the woods south of Xenia and ring a doorbell.