Page Toppers

Quotes

• The best inheritance a parent can give their children, is a good example.
• The best thing to spend on kids is time.
• A child does not need to be parented. He needs to be mothered and fathered. (Zan Thompson)
• A child enters your home and for the next twenty years makes so much noise that you can hardly stand it. The child departs, leaving the house so silent you think you are going mad. (John Andrew Holmes)
• Children come into the world expecting to eat when they're hungry;
  Our job is to teach them to eat when there's food.
• Children grow up to be adults, but Parents are Parents forever!
• Children need models more than they need critics. (Joseph Joubert)
• A common fallacy is that simply having a baby makes one a parent - which is as absurd as believing that buying a piano makes one a musician.
• Don't handicap your children by making their lives easy. (Robert A. Heinlein)
• Don't let your parents down; they brought you up!
• Don't worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you. (Robert Fulghum)
• Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children. (Charles R. Swindoll)
• Everyone likes to think that he has done reasonably well in life, so that it comes as a shock to find our children believing differently. The temptation is to tune them out; it takes much more courage to listen. (John D. Rockerfeller III)
• Happiness is the atmosphere in which all things grow.
• A happy childhood is the best horseshoe nail.
• How pleasant it is for a father to sit at his child's table. It is like an aged man reclining under the shadow of an oak he had planted. (Sir Walter Scott)
• A Hundred Years from Now...it will not matter what your bank account was,
  the sort of house you lived in, or the kind of car you drove...
  but the world may be different because you were important in the life of a child.
• If you have never been hated by your child you have never been a parent. (Bette Davis)
• If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. (Abigail Van Buren)
• If you want to do something positive for your children, try to improve your marriage.
• If you want your children to improve, let them overhear the nice things you say about them to others. (Haim Ginott)
• In the eyes of a child, love is spelled T-I-M-E.
• Letting a child dictate to you is the same as robbing him of a parent.
• Lucky parents who have fine children usually have lucky children who have fine parents. (James Brewer)
• My accomplishments? Let me show you these pictures in my wallet.
• My mom used to say it doesn't matter how many kids you have...because one kid'll take up 100% of your time so more kids can't possibly take up more than 100% of your time. (Karen Brown)
• No man can possibly know what life means, what the world means, what anything means until he has a child and loves it. And then the whole universe changes and nothing will ever again seem exactly as it seemed before. (Lafcadio Hearn)
• Only in a world of love can we unfold and bloom.
• Parenthood is the art of bringing your children up without putting them down.
• Parents can give children things or time - time is better!
• Permissiveness believes in letting the child do whatever he wants on the premise that if he gets killed doing it he won't do it again.
• Reasoning with a child is fine, if you can reach the child's reason without destroying your own. (John Mason Brown)
• Some times we're so concerned about giving our children what we never had growing up, we neglect to give them what we did have growing up. (James Dobson)
• Television has changed a child from an irresistible force to an immovable object.
• There are only two lasting bequests we can give our children - one is roots, the other, wings. Hodding (Carter, Sr.)
• There is trial marriage but no trial children.
• There's nothing wrong with using four letter words in explaining the facts of life to children - words like love, kiss, help, care, give...(Sam Levenson)
• To be in your children's memories tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today.
• To bring up a child in the way he should go, travel that way yourself once in a while. (Josh Billings)
• To show a child what has once delighted you, to find the child's delight added to your own so that there is now a double delight seen in the glow of trust and affection, this is happiness. (J.B. Priestley)
• We can give our children only two lasting bequests -
  one is roots, the other, wings.
• What a child doesn't receive he can seldom later give. (P.D. James)
• When you were a kid, you never understood what your parents were going through. Now you'd just like to know how they got through it.
• Who of us is mature enough for children before they arrive? The value of marriage isn't that adults produce children, but that children produce adults. (Peter De Vries)
• The work will wait while you show the child a rainbow,
  But the rainbow won't wait while you do the work.
• You can do anything with children if only you play with them. (Prince Otto van Bismarck)
• Your children need your presence more than your presents.

Keep Your Children Safe

(Bil Keane)

Better alarmed than harmed,
Better fearful than tearful,
Better warned than mourned!

Twelve Rules for Raising Delinquent Children

(The Houston Police Department)

• Begin with infancy to give the child everything he wants. He will then grow up to believe the world owes him a living.
• When he picks up bad words, laugh. This will make him think he's cute. It will also encourage him to pick up cuter phrases that will blow off the top of your head later.
• Never give him any religious training. Wait until he is 21 and let him decide for himself. (Don't be surprised if he decides to be "nothing."
• Avoid the use of the word "wrong." It might develop a guilt complex. This will condition him to believe later, when he is arrested for shoplifting of stealing a car, that society is against him and he is being persecuted.
• Pick up everything he leaves lying around - his books, shoes and clothing. Do everything for him so he will become experienced in throwing all responsibility on others.
• Let him read any printed matter he can lay his little hands on. Make sure the silverware and glasses are sterilized but allow his mind to feast on garbage.
• Have plenty of knock-down, drag-out fights in the presence of your children. Then, after you are divorced, they will not be surprised.
• Give your child all the spending money he wants. Never let him earn his own. Why should HE have things as tough as YOU had them?
• Satisfy his every craving for food, drink and comfort. See to it that every sensual delight is gratified. Childhood should be FUN! Denial may lead to harmful frustrations.
• Take his part against neighbors, playmates, friends, teachers and policemen. They are all prejudiced against your child.
• When he gets into real trouble apologize for yourself saying: "I never could do a thing with him."
• Prepare for a life of grief. You are apt to have it.

Love is:

Love is scaring away monsters at 1:00 a.m., then again at 2:00 a.m., 3:00 a.m...
Love is putting peanut butter on anything as long as they'll eat it!
Love is knowing how to disguise vegetables 30 different ways.
Love is reading the same bedtime story for the 999th time.
Love is a hug around the knees.
Love is watching Mr. Rogers instead of All My Children.
Love is cutting off the crusts.
Love is a refrigerator covered with creative works of art.
Love is standing in line for 2 hours for Raffi tickets.
Love is not grimacing through the dirtiest of diapers.
Love is trading in the Camero for a station wagon.
Love is the magic kiss that heals all "owies."
Love is a cuddly kid in a blanket sleeper.
Love is the first kick, first smile, first laugh, first step, first anything.
Love is your child pointing to a picture of Christie Brinkley and saying "mama."
Love is your child sound asleep, any child sound asleep.
Love is a macaroni necklace.
Love is wearing the macaroni necklace to church with pride.
Love is a peanut butter kiss, a syrup kiss, a chocolate kiss, any kind of kiss.
Love is when Bert & Ernie replace Redford & Selleck as your most admired men.
Love is not worrying about those few extra pounds cuz they make you more cuddly.
Love is knowing how to get out amoxicillin stains.
Love is a bouquet of dandelions.
Love is the smell of a baby's neck.
Love is saying "no" at the right times when it's easier to say "yes."
Love is saying "yes" at the right times when it's easier to say "no."
Oops, I hear someone calling. I'm off to chase monsters out from under the crib!
By the way, LOVE IS WHAT MAKES IT ALL WORTHWHILE!

 A quote by Dr. James Dobson

There is no higher calling in life than the
task of bearing and raising the children
whom God has trusted to our care.
We are given a few brief years to love
and guide them and instill the
values in which we believe.
Then suddenly, the children are grown
and have families of their own.
What endures for mothers and
fathers after that moment of release
is a precious museum of memories
to be enjoyed for the rest of their lives.

kites

When You Thought I Wasn't Looking

When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator,
and I wanted to paint another one.
When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you feed a stray cat,
and I thought it was good to be kind to animals.
When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you make my favorite cake for me,
and I knew that little things are special things.

When you thought I wasn't looking, I heard you say a prayer,
and I believed there is a God I could always talk to.

When you thought I wasn't looking, I felt you kiss me good night,
and I felt loved.

When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw tears come from your eyes,
and I learned that sometimes things hurt, but it's all right to cry.

When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw that you cared
and I wanted to be everything that I could be.

When you thought I wasn't looking, I looked...
and wanted to say thanks for all the things I saw when you thought I wasn't looking.

Riding a Bicycle

(Burton Hillis)

Tousle-haired Jimmy Hillyard, the six-year-old from down the block, is learning to ride his first bicycle. From our front-porch vantage point, Chris and I held our breath as we watched Jimmy's first shaky attempts at riding without training wheels.
Jimmy's dad would help steady the bike, give a gentle shove, and off the boy would lurch.
Of course, the bike traveled only a few wobbly feet on the first tries, propelled more by momentum from the takeoff than by Jimmy's struggles at pedaling and steering.
After each abortive attempt - with Jimmy sprawled on the curbing and the bike all askew - the lad would pick himself up, and with his father's steady encouragement, try again.
I think I counted a dozen spills, but there were no tears and no giving up until - at last - Jimmy made it from one end of the block to the other.
The look on the faces of Jimmy and his dad were priceless. Chris and I would have applauded from our grandstand seats, but I'm sure father and son needed no applause at that point.
It seems to me that bicycle-riding episode capsulizes the whole undertaking of raising a child. You hold and give support as long as you think it's necessary, then grit your teeth and give a shove. After the inevitable false starts and bruises, your offspring it - with luck - ready to travel alone.

Parents Catch Terminal Dumbness

(Erma Bombeck)

There isn't a parent alive who hasn't been struck down in their prime by a condition called "Terminal Dumb."
It's usually diagnosed by their teenagers, who kindly refer to it as "premature senility."
For some of us, it was a cruel blow. One day my mother was a bright, intelligent, worthwhile human being with something to contribute to society. That woman could do anything and I believed her. She could make the traffic light turn green by blowing it, cure my scraped knee by kissing it, and knew every answer to every question you could imagine.
Then one morning she woke up and she didn't know anything.
There wasn't an ounce of logic to anything she said. ("Wear boots. It's raining.) She became repetitious. ("Close the door.")
She couldn't remember things anymore. One day when she didn't remember that my sister got to lick the pan on her 14^th birthday and got a watch and I only got a boughten cake and a dresser set, I lost all respect for her. I was amazed she could feed herself.
Luckily, after I married, my mother pulled out of it. It was like a miracle. She got hold of herself and was once again able to carry on a conversation without being corrected, make a move without criticism and really began to understand and appreciate me.
I hadn't thought much about the disease until the other night at dinner when I said: "Do you know what I'm thinking of?"
"Don't end a sentence with a preposition, mother, and sit up straight. You're slouching. Your spine will grow that way."
"You are always criticizing me," I said. "You're making me psychotic."
"You misuse that word all the time," said my son. "Why don't you look it up?"
"I wish all of you would get off my case and stop prosecuting me."
"It's persecuting, p-e-r-s-e-c-u-t..."
I have a feeling that my mind has slipped out of my prime-time spot temporarily. I don't know how long before my miraculous recovery takes place, but hopefully it will be soon...for their safety.

Worrying

When do parents stop worrying about their children?
No question has been asked more or answered less.

Is there a magic cutoff period when offspring become accountable for their actions? Is there a wonderful moment when parents can become detached spectators in the lives of their children and shrug, "It's their life," and feel nothing?

When I was in my 20s, I stood in a hospital corridor waiting for doctors to put a few stitches in my son's head and I asked, "When do you stop worrying?" and a nurse with authority said, "When they get out of the accident prone stage."
My mother just smiled faintly and said nothing.

When I was in my 30s, I sat on a little chair in a classroom and heard how one of my children talked incessantly, disrupted the class and was headed for a career making license plates. As if to read my mind, a teacher said, "Don't worry. They all go through this stage and then you can sit back and enjoy them."
My mother listened and said nothing.

When I was in my 40s, I spent a lifetime waiting for the phone to ring, the cars to come home, the front door to open. A friend said, "They're trying to find themselves. In a few years you can stop worrying. They'll be adults."

By the time I was 50, I was sick and tired of being vulnerable. I still was worrying over my children, but there was a new wrinkle. There was nothing I could do about it. Yet I continued to anguish in their failures, be tormented by their frustrations and absorbed in their disappointments. My friends said when my kids got married I could stop worrying and lead my own life.
I wanted to believe that, but I was haunted by my mother's wan smile and her occasional, "You look pale. Are you all right?" "Call me the minute you get home." "Are you depressed about something."

Can it be that parents are sentenced to a lifetime of worry? Is concern for one another handed down like a torch to blaze the trail of human frailties and the fears of the unknown? Is concern a curse? Or is it a virtue that elevates us to the highest form of life?

One of my children became quite irritable recently when he said, "Where were you? I've been calling for three days and no one answered. I was worried."
I smiled a wan smile. The torch had been passed.

There's a proverb that is often misunderstood and misapplied..."Train up a child is the way that he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it." Many people have assumed it to mean that we are supposed to try to somehow force our children to become what WE want them to be, like pressing them into a mold and popping out a product.
I am told that the true meaning of the phrase, from its original translation ("according to his bent", like the natural growth needs of a tree that grows up), is that we need to teach each child according to his/her natural abilities/inclinations/needs...we are to study the individual carefully to determine personal strengths, weaknesses, and needs, and to do all we can to provide them with the teaching and the loving encouragement that they need to thrive and to reach their highest potential. Train him according to the way that HE (the individual) is designed to go! Too many of us are trying to make an apple tree out of an oak. We are trying to make the acorns into apples, with no success. (from Beth)

Parenthood Changes Everything...

...but parenthood also changes with each baby.

Here, some of the ways having a second and third child differs from having your first:

Your Clothes

1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

The Baby's Name

1st baby: You pore over baby-name books and practice pronouncing and writing combinations of all your favorites.
2nd baby: Someone has to name his or her kid after your great-aunt Mavis, right? It might as well be you.
3rd baby: You open a name book, close your eyes, and see where your finger points.

Preparing for the Birth

1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month.

The Layette

1st baby: You pre-wash your newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?

Worries

1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the baby.
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your 3-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Activities

1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.

Going Out

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home

1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of every day watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.